there's something about ..... spoof

Andre Agassi By ben Stiller



A few Good men by Ben Stiller



Lord of the Ring by Jack Black, as recommended by Jeff



Spiderman by Jack Black



panic Room by Jack Black

there's something about ..... breath and missing

Still on music.

Just realised my blog feels a tad too old with the average age of music around 25 years old. I think it's time to average down and also shows the hip-hop nature of me. Afterall, if MP in their 30s can do hip hop, I also can.

Many years ago I believe around 1998, I came across a performance in the Grammy Award which blown me away. It was the best performance I've ever seen.

Unfortunately I couldn't find that video in Youtube but found another similar one. Not as good as the one in Grammy but nevertheless still blown me away.



The respective MTVs ....

there's something about ..... name

Great!! Naming your kid is really important. Because my parents didn't think much when they name me and my name may sometimes become a joke.

you see... my name has a "kok" in it.

And since I identify myself as "kok ____", my clients expecially the caucasians will call me Mr ____ since to them, that is the last name or the surname.

Today, one of my client decided to be friendly and called me by my name.

She ended the conversation "Bye.... Cock"

there's something about ..... faceless music

These couple of days damn free and spend quite alot of time in Youtube looking at videos. So many things to see... it's amazing.

Since the Modern Talking video I posted 2 days back, I've been searching for old MTVs. There were so many songs that you love, many timelesss classics but you never able to know how the singers looks like.

Most of these are one-hit wonders. You like their song so much and you think to some extent these songs change your life but never think much about how they look like.

Until now.

And I must say they look funny.

F.R David


John Waite

there's something about ..... wonderful

I'm not so much into live music because I always think the artiste couldn't reproduce that kind of quality they do in a studio.

I was wrong.

there's something about ..... MI:II

Mission Impossible II, interview with Tom Crooze.

there's something about ..... dancing to the music

Came across this video in youtube which I thought was funny...




And then i ask myself and I know everyone out there will share my sentiments... there is this song that I'm sure everyone love it but will deny loving it.

So I'm dedicating this MTV to all my friends out there... I know Jeff love this, I know Leon love this.

there's something about ..... Plaza Sing

Now that Vivo City is finally opened... I'm sure that will be the go-to place for the many years to come. In fact, I'm confident that vivo city may even be more popular than Suntec City.

However, Plaza Singapura has always have a place in my heart. Just a place... nothing else. I remember hanging out there as a kid during the Yaohan days. There was this big Times bookshop on the fifth floor and there was Yamaha at the 6th or 7th floor where I learn my music. YES.... I learned music... though not much success.

However, in recent years... going to Plaza Singapura is becoming a big Pain.

You see.... with such a wonderful history behind and an old Car Park (which they kept during the retrofitting) vehicular system that makes so much sense during the early days that every developer should learn from it.... they decided to be "smart" and totally screw up the whole system. I bet it must be some scholar who did this to the car park. I mean... only scholar do such things. They do things unlogically.

Offence intended.

Let me explain the OLD car park concept.

1.) You enter from Handy Road and goes up to the car park thru the entrance on the left. This makes a good natural flow from the traffic coming from Handy Road.

2.) upon entering the car park, you will be entering the Car Park from the lowest floor up.

3.) As the car park is designed such that you will be able to see ALL the lots available as you drive, every car moves in the same direction. It's almost a case of first come, first serve basis. This is unlike those big car park found in Suntec City where every car can go in different directions to find car park lots. Over here, it won't happen.

4.) At which ever level you have park your car, you exit it at the level thru the ramp. Every level has a ramp for exit. This ensure immediate exit. So if you park at level 3, you exit at level 3.

5.) you exit out to handy road, again with the flow of traffic.

6.) just perfect!

Let me explain THE CURRENT SUPER SCREW UP CAR PARK SYSTEM DESIGNED BY SOME SMART ASS WHOM I'M SURE IT'S A SCHOLAR.

1.) You enter the car park via the ramp up from Handy Road. The entrance is on the right side of the building while you enter from handy road which is on the left side of the road. Almost often, there is a attendant or a security guard manning the criss-cross to help with the traffic.

2.) They come up with a a system whom they thought it's damn bloody smart. They have indicators at point of entry which levels have available lots.

3.) Assuming you enter into level 3 out of 7 storey, with an indicator showing there are 3 lots. What the indicator didn't show you is that there are already 3 other cars about to enter those lots and when you drive into level 3, you realised there aren't any more lots available. You drive down to level 2 and there aren't any lots, you drive down to level one and you realised you are exiting. You couldn't drive up because the only way up is thru the RAMPS and there is no access to the ramps when you realised you are at level 1, so you have to exit.

4.) So to play really safe, you drive the ramps up the level 7 where the electronic indicators suggested lots of lots available. So you drive round the ramps 7 times to get dizzy.

5.) naturally when you find a lot at level 7, you park there. You are afraid of situations no.3 as explained before.

6.) when you exit, you drive all the way level by level in the CAR PARK itself down to level one. It's not immediate, because in this narrow carpark, when 1 car try to park their car say, at level 5, all the exiting cars have to wait until this car parked before they can drive down. If you park level 7, you have to drive down 7 levels. Cars in the car park either are looking for a lot or they are exiting, thus often you have bottlenecks. While in the old system, the ramps are for exiting and the carpark is for finding a lot. In this new system, the ramps is just a transit and serve no purpose.

7.) you exit into Handy Road and you have to give way for cars trying to cross the junction entering the car park.

8.) It's a nightmare.

But WHY? Why did someone do something so silly? What is their rationale for doing what they did?

They wanted customers to find a lot faster knowing which level has lots but overall, there aren't much of a time savings.

Anyway, Vivo City is operated by Mapletree which is another government link company. Let's see how efficient they are in designing their car parks.

there's something about ..... F$%@ wealthy

This is how instant billionair react after becoming one. To be exact US$1.6billion.

Look at their smile. They can't hide their excitment of purchasing the ferrari.

Steve said "..... we wouldn't come close to where we are if not for the community" Yeah right.... "COME CLOSE"??!??!

Nabeh... I just had a hand in making someone filthy rich!

The people behind blogspot must be fuming mad. I would say that without blogging, youtube will not be as big as now.

there's something about ..... dry tank

Q1: Have you ever wonder what is the petrol allowance in your petrol tank of your car when your "low petrol" indicator light up till the time the petrol runs dry?

I mean... REALLY RUN DRY?

Q2: Have you ever wonder what happen to your car when your petrol tank runs dry?

I mean... REALLY RUN DRY?

Q3: Have you ever wonder what you would do when your petrol tank runs dry?

I mean... REALLY RUN DRY?

These are the things your parents never teach you nor your teachers in school because no one EVER let their petrol tank runs dry...... NO ONE......

.... except ME!

Nabeh! Of course, I have myself to blame. Stubborness and stupidity could sometimes achieve enlightenment in questions like above.

I just realised how important it is to have friends staying in different part of the island IN CASE EVER something like this happen and you can call them..... or call their brother to be precise.

I was along TPE when I knew I would be in trouble when I felt jerkiness in the car and immediately I put on the hazard light and keep left..... and pray......

...pray that you could somehow manage your way to the nearest exit along the expressway and find the nearest petrol kiosk.

... of course... praying doesn't work.... otherwise no one will be stupid and stubborn.

But I did manage to exit at Yio Chu Kang and my car slow down along the slip road and stalled for good. (ANSWER TO QUESTION 2)

I try to recall which of my buddies stayed near where I was and promptly this buddy that stays in SENGKANG BUT GOES TO HOUGANG everynight comes to my mind.

And so I called him... at time of blogging about 1am, he has yet to return call. So I did the next best thing and called his brother, who came to my rescue. Apparently some petrol kiosk sells cans of petrol for morons like me at $10 per can of 5 litres. (ANSWER TO QUESTION 3)

But while they sell you cans of petrol, they didn't provide you with a funnel. You ended wasting about half the petrol trying to pour it into the car's tank.

However, you don't have to pour all 5 litres into the tank. Just sufficient enuff for you to last till the nearest petrol kiosk for a full top up.

I did some estimation. Comparing the topping up of the tank this time plus whatever limited petrol I already put inside and my other top ups when the "low-petrol" indicator came on, the margin is about 6 litres.

Depending on the make of your car, you could multiply that with the fuel efficiency and you can roughly establish the distance before the tank drys up. In my case, it was 8km/litre, thus 42 km. (ANSWER TO QUESTION 1)

What is the moral of the story? Have more buddies staying in different part of the islands and make sure you also know their siblings well.

p/s: I have set the time and date of this blog to time of the incident.

there's something about ..... botak

If you haven't come across Botak Jones, the western-food-located-in-HDB-estates-serving-expensive-western-fares, then... you should pay them a visit either at Bedok or Ang Mo kio, and I heard in Clementi soon.

They serve up quite a storm really. It's operated by this Botak Ang Moh probably called Jones and they served Jack's Place standard steak and others at JAck's place prices in a HDB coffeeshop with food prepared by part-timers and served by part-timers. Usually such coffeeshops are so deserted that they dominated the whole coffeeshops probably paying low rent but reaping huge profits.

Do I sound very critical about this?

You see... I was a fan before. Located near where I stay.. I would visit them like once a week. Their Fish and Chips is really quite good. And they come in 2 sizes. You can upsize to a bigger portion if you are damn bloody hungry.

And so I day... I was really bloody hungry and decided to ask for the bigger size. However, when my order arrived, the tartar sauce given is not any more than the smaller order.

And so I promptly ask the "waitress" (they have like 10 employees on a Saturday night) if I can have more Tartar sauce.

The waitress replied: Yes. But that will be 50 cents more.

NABEH!!!

HELLO... ?!?!?!?!? You charge $9 for a fish and chips and you want to ask for 50 cents more for tartar sauce?!?!?!?!?!?

The rent at the coffee shop is probably only about $1500 a month. Plus all these part-timers that look like students working for you and yet you decided that your profit margin is too narrow to give me more TARTAR SAUCE!??!?!?!?!?!?

I have since boycotted them. Now I go to another market about 5 mins walk away from Botak Jone to have my fish and chips at $4, plus free-flow of Tartar Sauce.

there's something about ..... idol

Singapore Idol ended predictably.

I didn't follow the show that much until the last couple of weeks. One of my female friends is crazy about the show. She watches religiously and voted for her favourite singers.

Her favourite started with Jonathon Leong and later became Hady. During the final, she told me she voted about 10 times for Hady. So you could imagine her joy when Hady won.

She shouldn't have bothered.

It's no coincidence that another Malay won Singapore Idol. In fact, I have told my friend as way back during the final 4 or 5 that Hady would be in the Final 2 and will win the Idol. And my belief is not about his singing ability. Hady has a clean and boy next door image which make him more suited to be an "idol". But the end result wouldn't be any different if Hady has that rocker image as well.

I'm not racist. This is not a racist entry.

Hady won despite a better performance from Jonathon. Why?

With a viewership of around 300,000 each week, it's not a very big figure for the voting to be well spreaded across all social borders.

There are approximately 450,000 malays in Singapore and approximate 2.5m Chinese in Singapore. This figure can be found in www.singstat.gov.sg.

Most malay families watches Chanel 5 as their main channel. While most chinese families tuned in to Channel 8 as their main channel. Therefore, it's not difficult to derive that there are more Malay families tuning into Singapore Idol than Chinese.

But so what if there are more Malays watching than chinese? Isn't everyone Singaporean? What talk about races?

Malay community is one of the most united communities in Singapore. The chinese? We always treat cautiously when we meet another stranger, wondering if the chinese is out to take advantage of you. The Malays treat another Malay like one big family.

My point?

Malay will definitely vote for Hady. They might also vote for Jonathon. But they ensure they have 1 more vote for Hady. The Chinese have no such loyalty. They vote who they believe should win. Chinese who voted for Hady will not vote for Jonathon and vice versa.

There lies such cultural differences. Singapore Idol will not work in Singapore. Period.

My friend? She is a chinese.

there's something about ..... car park II

Earlier, I mentioned about the different car park systems in Singapore and how if you do not have sufficient funds in your cash card, you will have all cars piling behind you......

Well... that happened to me yesterday at TANGS.

I was there for about 1 hour and 20 mins and promptly decided that I have sufficient funds in my cashcard.

You see... everyone's optimism is different. Having $3.70 in my cashcard is enough for me to feel optimistic that THAT IS sufficient.

I mean... isn't sufficiency a relative judgement?

But one would ask... on a Sunday at TANGS, surely you would have reasons to feel otherwise?

I dunno. I mean... Suntec City would only be $2.10. Should I then have 20 feelings for 20 different malls? Even if it's $2 an hour, 1 hour 20 mins would at most be $3, well within my $3.70.

And so I started my journey towards enlightenment.

I knew I'm in trouble when I was stuck at the ramp down with all the cars in the queue before me. Someone else at the exit must be another optimist. You see... the way the car park is designed, when you are in the ramp, there is no other way out except the exit. Even if you decide to stop by the side, find the ATM to top up the cash card which is probably somewhere inside the mall, you can't do it. In other words, you are really stuck.

When I finally come within sight of the exit gantry, I was relieved to see a booth nearby where an attendant is inside probably reading newspaper, chatting on the phone, play Sudoko...

The fee.... $4.50!!!!!!

I have no choice but to go to the attendant to top up my card... but for reasons I can't explain, the machine wasn't working. It's like someone up there is trying to teach me a lesson. I probably spent about 5 mins there before the machine could work. By then, I have already seen a long line of cars queueing up.

Funny thing is... nobody was impatient enough to even make a light horn for the wait. This shows that such problem is getting more common.

Which brings me to the next question... why spend more money in new technology where it doesn't seems to solve any problems at all?

I mean.. you still need to have an attendant nearby in a booth when you are adopting a ERP styled car park system? Might as well stick to the old system.

there's something about ..... og

OG has the best business concept in Singapore. No other famous departmental store can come close. They appeal to a niche in Singapore and made their target-market very loyal to them via their loyalty programms that is the BEST IN THE WORLD.

My mum is a fan of OG. Like all Or-Bah-San in Singapore, OG is THE store. Not Metro, not Isetan, not Takashimaya. OG is to them, what sexy-photobook-in-kinokunia is to me.

And from a fan's perspective, the most desirable thing to own is the OG's member's card.

My first thought was that the card gives a discount on every purchase made in OG. However I soon realised the card merely gives you loyalty points for you to redeem gifts. And to entitle to a member's card, you have to spend $70 in one single receipt during their yearly membersip-renewal-excercise.

This already beat those loyalty programs from Credit Card companies and Petrol companies. While these companies give out free cards and hope you stay loyal, OG make the customer spend $70 and still have the customer's loyalty. No hope is necessary, it's a surebet.

And so my mum frantically needed to buy something so as not to miss out on the CARD of the Century. In order to fulfill my fillial-piety,I have decided to help by buying a child car-seat for my kid and thus qualify immediately.

And so we got the new card but we have to redeem all available points in our old card or those points will be forfeited.

Of course, redeeming gifts is the whole reason for getting the card in the first place. And off we go to the redeeming counter.

I went with high anticipation for a wide selection of good products. I mean... I was never dissappointed with those redemption programs from Petrol companies and Credit Card companies and surely this can't be that bad considering we had paid to be a member and have consistently purchased something throughout the year so that we can redeem wonderful gifts.

The first thing I realised when I enter the redemption area is that you get 1 point for every $10 spent. That is already double that of any credit card. And my mum has about 37 points to redeem. That raised my expectation of a wonderful selection.

NABEH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I COULDN'T BELIEVE MY EYES!!!

This is not Loyalty-program!!! It's a ROBBERY-PROGRAM!!!!

It's not FREE GIFT we are redeeming. It's to redeem an opportunity to BUY some products AT what looks like their original selling price or at best at 10% discount!!!!

150 points + $39 for a cooker?!?!?!??!?!

Pardon me... but why do I need to spend $1500 throughout the year so that I can buy a cooker at $39?!?!?!!??!?!?!? I might as well go buy the cooker at $39!!!!!


And what's with the shopping bag that looks like what you can buy at Basar Malam at $1!!! And you have to pay $2 for it!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!

NABEH!!!!

37 points entitled us to "redeem" three of those bags and not only that, pay $6 for it. And not only that...... TO QUEUE UP FOR 20 MINS FOR IT!!!! NABEH!!!!!!!!

I was so fuming mad that I told my mum that I'll give her $50 to give up the points and we leave immediately.

But you know... OR-BAH-SAN's loyalty is strong. To them, this act of "redeeming" is what they look forward to every year.

I look in front of my queue and I see these Or Bah San's face.... all breaming with joy.

Now... isn't this the BEST LOYALTY PROGRAM IN THE WORLD!!

there's something about ..... car park

By and large, there are about 6 car park system currently used in Singapore.

Starting from the old generation to the latest generation:

1. Coupon

Method: You purchase parking coupons and remove the tabs or chads if you are american, corresponding the the date and time at the point of parking and hope parking warden stop patrolling the area.

Problem: You have to ensure you have enough coupons in the car as these are only available for sales AWAY from these carparks.

Age of this system: Probably 25 to 30 years.

Where: Almost all HDB car parks and half of those surface carparks you find anywhere else.


2. Ticket; pay to human

Method: You pick up a ticket at the car park entrance from a validating machine. And you pay at the exit to the attendant stationing in a booth.

Problem: You have to ensure you have enough cash with you, otherwise, it can be a disaster if there are cars piling up behind you when you are exiting and you need to go draw cash from a ATM.

Age of this system: Probably 20 to 25 years.

Where can you find one: Shaw Centre at Beach Road


3. Ticket; pay t0 machine

Method: You pick up a ticket at the entrance. And before you leave the area or a mall, you pay at a ticket machine before picking up your car. You would have about 10 mins from time of payment to exit the mall.

Problem: Rather fuss free. You can often find a ATM around the corner if the car park charges is more than what you find.

Age of this system: Probably about 10 to 15 years.

Where can you find one: Liang Court

4. Cash Card system 1. Must wind down window one.

Method: You use the same cash card in the IU, instead of receiving a ticket from the gantry at the car park entrance, you insert your cash card into the machine to validate the time of entrance. At the exit, you again insert the same cash card into the machine determine the time spent and the amount. The amount is thus deducted from the cash card directly.

Problem: You have to ensure you have sufficient funds in the Cashcard. Otherwise, it can be a disaster if the cars are piling up behind you when you are exiting and you need to go top up the cash card somewhere.

Age of the system: About 5 years. And facing Obsolesence.

Where can you find one: Some car parks within a complex that may have a hotel component. Eg. Scotts Shopping Centre

5. Cashcard System 2. ERP style.

Method: It uses the cash card already in your car's IU. You do not have to do anything except to drive slowly pass the censor which will detect your cashcard and validate the time of entrance. When you exit, it will also automatically deduct from your cash card without having you to do anything.

Problem: You have to ensure you have sufficient funds in your cash card. Otherwise it can be a disaster if cars are piling up behind you when you are exiting and you need to go top up the cash card elsewhere.

Age of the system: Probably 3-4 years ago.

Where can you find this: Almost in every complex in Singapore... except the next one.

6. Cash card system 3. Also must wind down window one....

Method: Same as method 4.

Problem: You have to ensure there is sufficient fund in your cash card. Otherwise it can be a disaster if cars are piling up behind you WHEN YOU ARE ENTERING and you need to go top up the cash card at the Main Lobby of the OFFICE COMPLEX, after which YOU WILL TRY TO ENTER THE CAR PARK AGAIN!!! CASH CARD NO VALUE... SORRY YOU ARE TOO POOR TO ENTER OUR CAR PARK!!

Age of the system: Probably 3 years.

Where can you find this: CANON OFFICE AT HARBOURFRONT, KEPPEL BAY TOWER

there's something about ..... chee soon juan

I'm pro-pap. It's uncool to pledge your allegiance to a party that trys to be cool but I don't subscribe to coolness to start off. I subscribe to my personal beliefs.

Came across this link from another blogger. It's about Chee Soon Juan's flyers being "stolen" by the police. This makes an interesting read, but you have to know that this article comes from CSJ directly and it's totally biased and probably as flawed as his character. see link

Over the years, I have grown to admire CSJ. This guy got "balls", a term now approved by the government as "parliamentary" as said by George Yeo

Unlike other defacted politician like Tang Liang Hong or Francis Seow and others, he choose to remain in Singapore to fight his beliefs. Though the manner in which he fight his beliefs could have been more credible. For example, go on hunger strike without glucose drip.

As a bankrupt, he has nothing to worry about lawsuits against him. Is there any difference if you owe $300k or $1m? And he is smart enough not to be caught for for any jailable offence. So he continue to provide us with political entertainment.

But I don't pity him. As a family man, your first priority is to look after your family which in his instance, he has 3 kids. The next priority would then be your beliefs.

And to take care of your family, you have to ensure there is enough bacon in the house to take care of basic needs like food, education and other well-being.

But yet he go about his political career with such care-free attitude, you wonder if he cares about his family at all.

Unless of course, he family is already been taken care of.

I belief Chee Soon Juan has financial backing from overseas source. And these money may not go directly to him or he may have to pass it on to the OA. And of course, this remains my speculation. Just pure speculation.

Nevertheless, he makes Singapore interesting. Kudos to CSJ. But I will never vote for you.

there's something about ..... news

I walk past a newspaper vendor yesterday while waiting for someone and came across the headline in the NEW PAPER. It says "Mistress give one-eye dragon a baby"
story link

Wah biang. SINGAPORE DAMN Drama-less. Our lives is so damn bored that a murderer/loan shark's offspring is reported in our daily newspaper.

Imagine a IMF delegate bought the newspaper and ask the Singaporean's representative....

IMF delegate: May I know what is this one-eye dragon? Is it a endangered species in the zoo and you guys managed to ensure this species do not extinct?

Singapore rep: err.... yes.. it's endangered before.... and this species will soon be extinct.

IMF delegate: Oh... then you guys did a wonderful job to ensure there is now a off-spring. Is this dragon like a Cameleon?

Singapore rep: er... no.. it's a shark.

IMF delegate: wow.... a shark that looks like a dragon... I just knew Singapore is exotic... can I go to the zoo to see it...

Singapore rep: err.....

Just wonderful.

there's something about ..... banquet

I am beginning to feel that my blog has a whining + complain theme to it.

I went to Ang Mo Kio Central 2 days ago for dinner. My family decided on comfort and head towards BANQUET (the former A&W location, wow... how I missed those A&W days) where they have converted the coffeeshop to be a foodcourt with air-conditioning.

I'm not a fan of Banquet. I don't see how a chinese local fare prepared the halal way is appealing as compared to other foodcourts. I have tasted some of the food and while it's a close resemblance to non-halal preparation, you felt it's still different in a lesser way.

While other foodcourts are started by long time coffeeshop operators with lots of experience behind the foodcourt/coffeeshop business, BANQUET is started by a Contractor who failed in the construction industry and jumped on the banwagon of a highly lucrative industry. In order to have a go at a lease, he promised the landlord that his foodcourt is different and it will be 100% halal. The rest is history.

While the Malays could finally taste Wantan Mee and Bak Chor Mee without Bak Chor, there seems to have no motivation for a chinese to patronise them while down the street, you will have a Bak Chor Mee with Bak Chor. I mean.. we are talking about Ang Mo Kio Central where you have gazillions of coffeeshops at every 10 steps you make.

So I decided to go "western" and ordered a BBQ spring chicken. On the menu, the picture indicated a accompanying side-dishes of fries and salad at $7.

When the meal arrived, there was none of the side-dishes but just the chicken.

moomooman : Sorry... where is the fries?

Stall helper: No fries.

Moomooman: huh? Your picture here got fries!

Stall helper: No fries.

Moomooman: Then you should change your picture.

stall helper: (no response... just look straight at me)

I was pissed!! Not so much about the missing fries but their attitude towards the whole incident. I decided to teach them a lesson. Their chilli sauce was free-serving in a bottle. So pour out almost half the bottle of chilli right in front of them and walk away.

Of course I did not finish the chilli sauce.

And of course I will not patronise another Banquet outlet again.

there's something about ..... speeches

Coincidentally, Sunday Times feature an article on local motivational speakers and their rates.

It was mentioned that Nanz Chong has 8 to 10 engagements per month now, ranging from $2k to $10k per engagement.

Assuming the lowest figure of 2k x 8 engagement, we are talking about $16k income a month minimum. At the maximum, we are talking about 100k a month.

If I knew failing is so lucrative, then I rather fail. No need to worries about inventory, staff costs, shop space, balance sheet, etc etc.

The papers quoted that "she decided to go into speaking to help others with her message".

She describes her style as "High-energy, impactful and humorous"

It was also quoted that her story of her business' demise has often moved audience members to tears, she says "sometimes we need to hand out tissue boxes"

Wah... very noble hor.... since you want to help others with your message, can dun pay or not?

Actually there is nothing sad about her failings and the subsequent bankruptzy. In Singapore Law, even if you are a Bankrupt, your CPF remains intact and the creditors can't touch the money in your CPF.

All those CPF that she has over the years would be high enuff to ensure she has a comfortable retirement after 55. On top of that, her husband would be able to find a good job to support the family.

So she is not exactly in dire straits.

If she is, do you think she would be pregnant during the down period?

Imagine... your business is failing.... you are facing bankruptsy.... but hey... let's get in the mood to procreate.

In the same article, it was also mentioned that almost the whole Mount Everest expedition team is into motivational speaking.

Robert Goh says "If we can motivate people to climb mountains when they are not paid to, then surely we can motivate people who are paid to do what they do."

Well said. Except that Khoo Swee Chiow is said to have applied for Grant from Government plus he is sponsored by Hitachi and many others.

The papers mention that Mr Robert Goh recently quit his job as an aeronautical research scientist at DSO national laboratories to pursue motivational speaking and coahing full-time. His fee is about $5000 per hour.

Money Talks!

there's something about ..... books

Yesterday I had about 1.5 hours of waiting time to kill at bugis and I decided to visit the kinokunia (pardon my spelling, it could be worse).

I like to visit the business section. Of course, I would also like to visit those sexy photobook of japanese models, but unfortunately they are not meant for browsing. Damn it!

Anyway, I managed to read a few pages of Nanz Chong's 1 business 99 lessons. I've also flip thru Adam Khoo's book about becoming a millionaire. Plus also other related "sales" book on how to "sell" effectively. Not to mention other Rich Dad Poor Dad's series.

And I realised something.

They write books not with the intention to guide as their primary motivation, they write books to profit from it.

I mean.... why read about Nanz Chong's failure? Shouldn't we be reading someone else's success instead, like what they did correctly and not what they did wrongly. Nobody has a more celebrated bankcruptzy than Nanz Chong. She is now making more money giving motivational speeches and selling books. Why am I such a critique on her? Because... this book sucks!! In order to tie in with her 1.99 concept, she has to ensure there are 99 lessons to write. And some of these lessons are lame.

The same can be mentioned about the other "sales" book. If you are a fantastic sales man, you probably got no time to write a book. You will spend those time making more money in your trade. Of course, if your trade is about writing a book then... your expertise is not so much about "marketing" but about "writing".

And not to mention Rich Dad Poor Dad, which I was never a fan of. The original book is used by all MLM sellers, and you know if MLM uses them... the book can't be any good.

there's something about ..... stingray

Just heard the news that the world-renowned Australian "crocodile hunter" and television environmentalist Steve Irwin has been killed by a stingray on the famed Great Barrier Reef.

I thought this was a news big enough to call coolcat about this tragic accident.

Coolcat: Stingray can sting people one meh?

Now we know why the name. And not only that, it's deadly.

While I'm sad that someone so famous died while on the job on educating the world, I can't help thinking that he got killed by a famous hawker dish in Singapore.

A hawker dish we so take it for granted. Often complaining that the meat not enuff, chilli not out enuff and hawker try to bluff us on the price etc etc. But we never think about the danger that fishermen go thru in order to make that dollar.

I think it's a matter of time the price of stingray goes up. They now have a case to highlight the dangers involved.

there's something about ..... zoe tay vs SPH part II

Last year, I did a blog on Zoe Tay vs SPH Part I , and I thought it's a good time to do Part II now.

The case surrounded an article published by SPH with regards to Zoe Tay's endorsement deals which implied that she has lied to the general public about her sexual ignorance. As usual, SPH is represented by Senior Counsel Davinder Singh. Zoe Tay's representing Counsel is not named as it wasn't necessary.

Davinder Singh (DS): Oh.. it's you again. Why you like to sue SPH every year?

Zoe Tay (ZT): because SPH like to write untrue articles about me.

DS: We will know whether they are true or not soon. What is your understanding of the product you are endorsing now.

ZT: It's a supplement for beautiful skin. I have been using it for a long time.

DS: So you just pop it into your mouth and you will have beautiful skin?

ZT: something like that.

DS: Do you chew?

ZT: No. I swallow.

DS: Other than this supplement, what else you swallow in your daily life?

ZT: Water. Sometime Bak Chor Mee and Mee Siam. But I always say Mai Harm.

DS: Have you swallow any bodily fluid from your husband before?

ZT: Honour, I object that question, it's invading my privacy.

Honour: You have to answer the question. It's a key question to the case. Please answer it.

ZT: Yes. When he kiss me after drinking lots of water, sometimes I swallow his saliva.

DS: So, you do swallow after a sexy act with your husband.

ZT: I mean...

DS: Just answer yes or no.

ZT: If you mean...

DS: Just answer yes or no.

ZT: Yes.

DS: So you agree that "swallow" has a sexual innuendo in the advertisement.

ZT: It wasn't to me. I don't see anything wrong with it.

DS: The question is not whether you see anything wrong with it. The question is whether other people who saw the advertisment will think there is a sexual innuendo in the advertisment. Do you think your advertisment will led people to think that way?

ZT: If they have a filthy mind, I'm sure they would.

DS: So you agreed that the advertisment did have that kind of sexual innuendo.

ZT: No. I don't agree.

DS: If you don't agree, then why is there a need to emphasise on "swallow", is there any other way you can consume a tablet?

ZT: Ok lah... you win lah... I don't want to discuss this anymore.

DS: One last question.... which stall got sell Mee Siam with Harm?

there's something about ..... rivalry

Like the saying goes.... if you can't beat them, Join Them.


Apple Computer announced it would pay Singapore-listed Creative Technology 100 million dollars to settle a dispute over patented technology used in iPod and Nano MP3 players.

The deal ended a budding legal battle that began earlier this month after Creative was awarded what it referred to as a "Zen patent" on technology used to select and sort songs in its Zen MP3 player.

Creative went to US court, and the US International Trade Commission, to accuse Apple of infringing on its patent by using the technology in iPod and Nano players.

"Creative is very fortunate to have been granted this early patent," Apple chief executive Steve Jobs said in a statement. "This settlement resolves all of our differences with Creative, including the five lawsuits currently pending between the companies, and removes the uncertainty and distraction of prolonged litigation."

Apple would pay Creative 100 million dollars for a license to use the technology and would be able to recover some of the money if Creative licensed the patent to others, according to the companies.

Under the terms of the settlement, Creative, an Apple rival in the MP3 player market, would also begin marketing its own line of iPod accessories as part of Apple's "Made for iPod" program.

"We're very pleased to have reached an amicable settlement with Apple and to have opened up significant new opportunities for Creative," said Creative chairman and CEO Sim Wong Hoo.
"Apple has built a huge ecosystem for its iPod and with our upcoming participation in the Made for iPod program we are very excited about this new market opportunity."

there's something about ..... youth

I can't help it...

"YOUTH CHALLENGE'S FOUNDER CHALLENGED BY YOUTH"

************************

Today I had a sms "conversation" with a buddy on this piece of news. He used to be a volunteer there.

me: wah... 13k a month.. like cannot see what they do here.

buddy: hello... they now do UN projects liao ok... they see singapore no up liao.

me: wah... singapore youth not challenging enuff issit...

buddy: no... they go other countries to con other youth....

********************

anyway... read the article and discover certain information...

The founder was in the mist of a Crisis Management conference in Malacca when he was interrupted about this crisis back home. I must say... he managed the Crisis quite well.

When ask about allegations that he ran Youth Challenge like a "one-man show" like T.T Durai.... He replied "I'M THE FOUNDER."

Now I know. When face with Crisis... deal with it with arrogance.

*********************

The founder revealed that he's paid ABOUT 13k a month. He said "I can't remember exactly as I don't update my bank book all the time".

Hmmmm.... come to think of it.... I have never update my bank book. The bank always send me a statement.

**********************

13k a month. Last year they raised 400k of donations. Plus 100k of reserve. His pay p.a over the total fund is a astonishing 31%

there's something about ..... national day rally (updated)

I have watched the Rally since a young age. I remembered the LKY's days when he flashed alot of charts and graphs. I remembered his last Rally where I thought it was really poignant.

I have watch GCT's first rally all the way to his last rally. How he has changed the tone of the rally to include humour.

I have also watch PM Lee's first rally. Veli long. Veli Sian. But since last year, he has improved the whole rally concepts to include some humour plus videos.

It was expected days before his rally that he would mention about Blogging, Mr Brown and Bah Chor Mee.

And the anticipation of those mention was high. He encouraged and recognised the impact of Blogging. He listed talkingcock.com as a funny website, some funny and some not so funny, according to him.

He mentioned about Mr Brown, even mention his real name. He said that what Mr Brown said was wrong and the Government has the right to rebuke him.

He mentioned Bah Chor Mee. He implied that should podcast be used for political reasons, then the PAP may have to engage JACK NEO to do a podcast on "MEE SIAM MAI HARM".

eerrrr ......... PM Lee..... can tell me which stall you patronise.....


Check out the lastest Podcast from Mr Brown

there's something about ..... life story

Caught the Channel 5 program "Life Story" on Tuesday night.

They feature the life of Abigail Chay. That aesthetic-challenged looking woMAN who acted in Under One roof. I have always thought that this woman looks like a man and now I know that he was a man before.

Her story was really poignant, and you really feel sorry for her.

Interestingly, TCS found a guy that acted as Abigail of her early days as a man. My god... TCS is really good when it comes to such things. That guy looks like Abigail's twin brother. I feel sorry for him too.

Later part of the show, Abigail acted herself. Of course, she couldn't act to save her life. It's tough not to notice her acting while trying to feel sorry for her.

I was told by my wife that her mother was that granny in that famous Macdonald advertisement that says "带 你 出 来，很 麻烦。" And throughout the show, the actress acting Abigail's mother was so convincing, it was heart-wrenching. Even more so when you have a visual image of the mother.

there's something about ..... veil of secrecy

Got this from "resting places".

Photographer : Say Cheese...........


"That's me in front of the famous monument" says one

"err... which one?"

there's something about ..... eric khoo's movies

reviews taken from offical website... except the last one
"One can only hope for more discoveries like Eric Khoo"Howard Feinstein, Timeout Magazine

"A vibrant punchy, sometimes moving street film. The characters are memorable, the sense of place pungent and colourful"Michael Wilmington, The Chicago Tribune

"For an idea of the good things that may be in store for Singapore's nascent film industry, check out Eric Khoo's Mee Pok Man. This well-crafted story about a prostitute and slow-witted noodle seller packs a big wallop. This film rates three and a half morbid twists out of four."AsiaWeek Magazine

"It has to be seen to be believed."Whang Yee Ling, 8 Days

"A tragic love story which lays bare the desolation and alienation lying just beneath the sheen of Singapore's economic success story. Unpretentious and honest cinematic fare, Mee Pok Man, an excellent film provides rich and satisfying food for thought."Michael Wouthwill, The New Paper

"Mee Pok Man is the best piece of local film in too long a time. More importantly, it holds that quality cinema is truly a possibility in Singapore."Corinne Kerk, Business Times

"This is one of the worse movie ever made in Singapore's history alongside "Tiger's whip". With full anticipation of the movie given rave reviews, I was not only dissappointed by the quality of the movie but I felt nauseous at the same time. It was really really bad. It makes me feel that I can also become a good director but I realised I do not have a billion dollar wealth to support me. Avoid this movie at all cost" moomooman, cowdunk.blogspot.com

Reviews taken from official website ..... except the last one

"Writer/director Eric Khoo and co-writer Wong Kim Hoh have come up with a cerebral solution to the intractable problem of making a Hallmark movie.The result is Khoo’s most heartfelt and heartwarming movie to date. It is also the most sophisticated piece of film-making to emerge from the Republic’s budding film scene.The way Khoo has marshaled his technical skills in the service of more characterization and story marks a new stage in his development.Be With Me is an emotional maturation. His tender regard, especially evident in the old shopkeeper’s story, takes his storytelling to the necessary next level.The movie’s title is a simple plea. Be With Me. You will be rewarded if you answer its call." The Straits Times – Ong Sor Fern

"Slowly – ever so slowly – individual characters are introduced to viewers, who are then called upon to piece the diverse cinematic puzzle together. Just as the camera likes to linger lovingly on human faces and inanimate objects alike, so too the screenplay, penned by Khoo and Wong Kim Hoh, is a study in verbal economy, with barely a word or two uttered by many of the principal characters. Most of the narrative comes in the form of subtitled text from Chan’s manuscript.This minimalist approach works because we are left to focus on feelings and emotions rather than dialogue. Meanwhile, Singapore is presented as a city bereft of its usual bustle and sheen, with many scenes taking place in simple homes, empty corridors and quiet streets.After wowing the audience at Cannes and winning distribution deals in Europe, Be With Me is compelling proof that a Singapore film can successfully stand up to scrutiny from a sophisticated international art house crowd. Thanks to Khoo’s fine cinematic eye, it fully deserves to do the same over here." The Business Times – Geoffrey Eu

"One small, lovely film from Singapore made human communication its explicit subject – Eric Khoo’s “Be With Me”….. When I mentioned “Be With Me” at the beginning of this piece, I did so with a conviction that it deserves wide distribution, and will find an appreciative audience. Almost silent and mysteriously disjointed at first, the film comes together into something that’s as accessible as it is beautiful." The Wall Street Journal – Joe Morgenstern

"I was in tears by the end, which is fairly rare." The New York Times – Manohla Dargis

"Finally, a piece of art from Eric Khoo. This is by far his best work of only 3 films. It's both arty and touching. The true story of Theresa Chan makes you want to know more about her. To get the real person to act herself is even more the credible this already is. While "Meebokman" is a junk, "12 storey" an entertaining film, "Be with me" really shows Eric Khoo's flair in film-making. I'm totally impressed." moomooman, cowdunk.blogspot.com

there's something about ..... patriotism

There is at least 6 groups of patriotism in Singapore:

The lowest level: Take the opportunity of the public holiday to travel overseas (therefore save on 1 annual leave)

No. 5: Take the day off to go shopping and totally miss out on NDP parade on TV. National Day Sales more important mah.

No. 4: Go to NDP parade LIVE. These people care as much about National Day as the festival mood that comes from it. They may not even watch NDP on TV if not for the free tickets. Not to mention the goody bag.

No. 3: Those who bought NDP tickets via ebay to attend NDP live. Kudos to them. The goody bag must be good.

No.2: Those who watch NDP on TV without fail every year. I mean... for something so boring.... and they have a choice not to watch it and they do... this is patriotism.

AT NO. 1: And I think NO ONE CAN BEAT ME.... rent 2 movies MADE in SINGAPORE BY SINGAPOREAN from Videoezy on the eve of National Day!!!!

there's something about ..... celebration II

Couple of posts ago... I mentioned about celebrating nation building.

Hooray again!!! Within 1 week to National Day... LTA announces more celebration plans by increasing Toll for CTE, PIE and ECP. Of which CTE Kenna the most.

WONDERFUL!!!!!!

After declaring their success of the evening ERP along CTE, this increment must suggest that it's not that successful afterall.

But while I'm at it... Why not extend the ERP till 12mn. That way.. should I ever need to go back from a late dinner (refer to my earlier post), I wouldn't get stuck in the CTE for 1 hour.

A thought struck me recently.

While our first Prime Minister is the MP of the prestigious estate in Tanjong Pagar, our second PM oversee the next prestigious estate in East Coast.....

...our third PM oversee ANG MO KIO??!!!

At least give Redhill or Queenstown or Bishan mah....

there's something about ..... opportunist

Just realised my wife is an opportunist. She hide behind this blur-blur and non-strategist facade so well that I fell into the trap.

You see, my visit to my in-laws (only on Sunday) follow quite closely with Singapore's way of managing car population. I set myself quotas.

The quotas at this point, now and ever, is ONCE A WEEK ..... at the MAXIMUM. In fact, I'm toying with the idea of setting the unit for this quota from trips per week to no. of hours per week as I realised the stay over at the in-laws in that 1 time per week has dragged on for too long.

Recently, my in-laws has a sibling coming over from mainland China to stay here for 2 weeks. This is the first time this sibling has visited them and they have never met each other. (long story)

This sibling is already in his 70s. I supposed this visit is to fulfill a life-long wish of seeing next of kin in another part of the world.

And this might also be their last meeting.

And so I thought there might be a farewell gathering of sort last Sunday to coincide with my usual visit as they are scheduled to leave Singapore on Thursday (yesterday).

However... nothing was organised. Not that I really care.

On Monday night, I was having a casual conversation with my wife.... while playing my game. To me, that was a way to add more time to the short hours that I have for myself. So I like to multi-task.

So while engrossing on my game, ALL I MADE WAS A VERY VERY VERY CASUAL REMARK.....

The remark was "We should have a farewell dinner organised for them".

And while I was still engrossing on my game, the next thing I know was she was making phonecalls to my in-laws telling them we should have a dinner on WEDNESDAY NIGHT before their departure.

I jumped round!!!!! But she was facing strategically away from me.

And I knew the damage is done.

What I meant was... "we should have organised something for them over the weekend but now it's already over... it's a pity". I didn't meant we should organise something on the weekday night just before their departure.

Ultimate!!!

Lesson learned: NEVER..... NEVER..... multitask while having a converation with your wife.

there's something about ..... cruelty

I captured this on my camera... over the weekend.

The organiser has a cruel sense of humour. It's disgusting to the core... but I loved it.

I pity those people in the video. Especially that aunty in the middle in the blue blouse. She is so clueless.

there's something about ..... fried chicken

Wah biang. My second chicken post in the last 1 month.

I went to KFC over the weekend to try their new Chicken Chop. And they really take their name literally. They chop so much off the meat that whatever they serve you is probably slightly bigger that the chicken patty of their burger.

The verdict: It's too small, too unfullfilling, too saltish.... I wouldn't go back again for the chop.

This post however is not about the chicken chop. It's about the experience.

I love KFC. Just like I love Singapore. But I really do.

I'm a big fan of their original recipe and I wouldn't eat their crispy version if I have a choice. No choice... don't say Crispy.... chicken chop also eat. But the original recipe is always much smaller in size. I reckon I need to eat about 4 to 5 in order to feel totally satisfied.

Because of that, I will always request that they don't give me the chicken wings. And they will usually replace it with either the breast meat or the bony piece. It's almost like an unspoken rule. People who request to change the drumstick or wings, just give them the bigger meat.

The logic is simple. People who come to KFC loves to eat chicken. If they love to eat chicken, they love every part of the chicken. Whatever you give them, they will love it. So it's never about the chicken. Then it must be the portion.

They have never never failed me. never. except Saturday.

And it's even more unusual when it was the supervisor serving me.

How did they fail me?

I asked for a 3-piece meal together with the chicken chop of course. My 3 piece meal consist of the breast meat, the drum stick and the wing. To me.... this is the biggest sin ever.

The drum stick and the wing??!?!? The combined size which is equivalent to 3 french fries add together!!

So I ask the supervisor to have the chicken wing changed.

At this point, I overhead her conversation with another colleague of hers and I realised this supervisor came from China. I was shocked. I was shocked because this was the first time I was served by a mainland chinese. And she is the supervisor??! Are these "foreign talent" snatching jobs from locals? That issue aside. This is not the reason for this post.

And so she return to me with my request of changing the chicken wing to something else.

The new combination: Chicken breast, drum stick..... and drum stick!!

there's something about ..... celebration

Been rather busy lately. Work was taking up alot of time just before Ghost month started. When ghost month started... I decided to spend more time on "mini" projects. I'm creating 2 more blogs. One private blog of family photos and one specialty blog.

However, seeing National Day around the corner... I have decided to celebrate nation building with this blog.

You see.... I LOVE SINGAPORE.

Along the way, you will get really fed-up with progress (ooopss) and fines, summons and whathaveyou. But generally Singapore is a great place to stay. We need to see war in other countries before realising this.

Along the way, government comes out with great planning details. Some ingenious stuff like ERP, COE etc, that make Singapore so unique. I believe the ERP concept has taken the World by storm and some of the more develop countries are also adopting this approach.

When you have traffic jam here.... easy..... put up ERP gantries. That will ease traffic and will increase your driving speed from 30km/hr to 40km/hr. Even if it doesn't ease traffic woes, who cares... Government will pocket the dues from the ERP and then they will have enough money for PLAN B.

But...... why set up ERP on the way back? How would that impact the government or the economy as a whole? No answers... but it doesn't matter.

But.... what happen after the ERP hours are over in the evening about 8.30pm?

The answer:

IT TAKES A BLOODY 1 HOUR FROM CTE COMING IN FROM CHINATOWN TO ANG MO KIO!!!!

ASSHOLE!!!!!!!

I had just finished dinner in Chinatown last night with family's friends about 9.30pm. And when I enter the CTE in Chinatown about 9.45pm, I was stuck in the tunnel travelling at speed of "STOP...MOVE 1 feet.... STOP... MOVE 1 feet" (I couldn't read the speedometer as it hardly move) for about 30 mins before I could next see the sky at the tunnel portion at the CTE entrance from PLAZA SINGAPURA. 30 MINS between chinatown and plaza Sing.

And it takes me another 30 mins from the tunnel portion behind plaza Sing to exit Ang Mo Kio.

BLOODY ASSHOLE!!!!!!!

I think Government has achieved their aim. Let those rich guys pay the ERP and reach home sooner so that they can have a better quality lifestyles and let those poorer chap get stuck in CTE FOR 1 hour. And if you stay woodland... 1.5 hours in CTE/SLE.

Oh... I forgot..... I'm celebrating nation building. Hooray.... to great planning!!!!!

there's something about ..... PE

Just read that you can now take PE as an "O" level subject.

Wonderful news.

I wonder what they will test you on the Theory.

Q1: What did Materazzi said to Zidane before the Headbutt incident?
a) Mother F%$ker
b) Mother and Sister F$%ker
c) You terrorist
d) No one knows

Q2: Which fictional character does Ronaldinho looks like?
a) Scooby Doo
b) Jar Jar Bing
c) Snoopy
d) Garfield

Q3: How many kids do Fandi Ahmad has?
a) 3
b) 4
c) 5
d) 6

Q4: Which is Singapore National Sports?
a) Shopping
b) Queueing
c) Betting
d) complaining

there's something about ..... brownie

This post is about the brown vs goverment vs today saga. Super duper old news but it's better to make comments now when the dust has settled, anything earlier, it would be too emotional.

Click here for the full transcript of brown

Everybody loves Raymond brown. He is like the Mentor Minister of Blogging. Everybody knows Brown as a humorous chap unless you work for the Ministry for Information, Communications and the Arts. They don't see humour. Which is why "Arts" is added to the ministry but not "Comedy".

But what they do know is that Brown is a very very popular man. And if a very very popular man says something not politically correct, general public may believe him. Blog may not be as accessible as Today. They do not have a computer with Brown as the homepage in all MRT, 7/11s and Mamashops. They realised the influence of Brown and they need to set the records straight.

I read Brown's column via his website all the time. I enjoy it thoroughly. Even when I read his last column, I found it to be humorous tackling on rising costs issue. But I do sense some "red alert" in the article, perhaps testing new boundary of OB?

And what do you expect the Government to do? They need to do a job. If this is the Qing Dynasty, Brown would have been taken and he will be beheaded. But in modern Singapore, you only kenna a "scolding" from Ministry and lose your rice-bowl from the same Newspaper who failed to see this coming and approved the article.

I don't see anything wrong with the Goverment's reply. They are government what.... they are not human beings. They function with a set of rules of high order. They are supposed to be rigid like iRobots. "Yes" is "Maybe"... "No" is "No". As I said, they have a job to do.

In fact they did the job the right way. By writing to the forum page of Today. They didn't try to send emails to the boardroom of Today to take action. The reply was also targeting at journalism as a whole, indirectly on the role of Today. They were... transparent about their action. They should be applauded for doing a job, nevermind that it's a unpopular thing to do.

What happen at the board room in TODAY is anyone's guess. Someone has to lose a job. So let's put the blame on the columist, afterall, without his article... they wouldn't be in that sorry situation.

But what about the Editor? The Chief Editor?

Someone must have vetted through the article. What happen to them? If anyone is at fault, it's the editor. Not brown. Otherwise, why give a salary to editor who didn't do the job of editing?

Today's action of terminating Brown is that of a evil "TAI JIAN" or eunuch (dunno how to spell). Very below the belt. (oopss....)

Make TODAY... yesterday's news.

there's something about ..... "the" condo names

Recently I came upon an TV advert for a condominium in the North-east region called "THE QUARTZ", next to buangkok MRT.

I don't envy the project manager in charge of condo project. They have so much to do and so much responsibility and liability, it must have drained off alot of their energy and .... creativity as well.

Come up with a common condo name of the 80s and 90s, and you will have :

XXX garden
XXX court
XXX ville
XXX Vale
XXX park
XXX point
XXX green

And the project may not sell. Not that names matter... but it's nice if the names reflect certain characteristic of the buyer or their liking and thus achieve what the condo was trying to sell.

Then in the early 2000s, you have condo named after city or town of famous countries with foreign-sounding-very-mouthful names like Cote D' Azur (France), Costa Del Sol (spain), The Marbella (Spain), The Azure (france) D'Ecosia (I dunno).

Of course, if the developer is to target heartlanders, it's good to have a heartlander's names like Bishan Park, Bishan Point, Bishan Loft etc.

Lately, naming condo is becoming easy. Just add "THE" in front of anything, and you have a catching sounding name plus the exclusiveness associated with it. "THE" is supposed to illustrate that something is unique of it's kind and there is no comparison, like "THE SUN".

However, I think most developers are taking this a litttttllllleeeee too far. The earlier post shows all the condo/apartment projects in Singapore that started with "The". Some of these are really ridiculous.

I can understand the convenience of naming the condo after the street name just to tell people that any other condos along the same street do not carry the same prestige... but.....

"THE GRANGE" at grange road?
"THE BALMORAL" at balmoral road?
"THE BAYSHORE" at bayshore road?
the most classic.....
"THE CHUAN" at Lorong Chuan road??!?!?!?!?! What is the "Chuan" supposed to mean?

If your rival developer has already named their condo after the streetname... what should you do? How about naming something that is damn difficult to pronounce... that way unique mah...

For example:
THE BECCAGAYLE
THE CALYPSO
THE CARPMAELINA,
THE ELYSIA
THE GERANIUM
THE GLENCAIRD RESIDENCES
THE GRANDIFLORA
THE HACIENDA
THE HELICONIA
THE MADEIRA
THE NEXUS
THE PALLADIUM
THE SHAUGHNESSY
THE SUNNIDORA
THE VERMILION

I'm sure the above has a meaning. I'm too lazy to go find out what each of these mean but I'm sure it meant something to the owner who bought units there.

Friend ask proud owner: Where you stay har?

Proud owner: I stay at The Helicopter.

But what if your rival developer has already named their condo after the streetname and another developer has named their condo after something very cheem.... what to you do? How about a reverse pyschology and named your condo after something simple, something that everyone can pronounce, don't care what it means to the buyer... as long as people know how to read.....like...

THE QUARTZ.

What the hell is the "QUARTZ"? That everything in the condo works like a clock...every security guard will be on time for their duty. The flood lights at the tennis clock will switch off exactly at 10pm?

Maybe they should have named it "The Buang" or "The Kok" or "The white elephants".

there's something about ..... the

THE 101, THE ABERDEEN, THE ABODE AT DEVONSHIRE, THE ALBANY, THE ALBRACCA, THE ALCOVE, THE AMSTON, THE ANCHORAGE, THE ANSLEY, THE ARC AT DRAYCOTT, THE ARCADIA, THE ARDMORE, THE ARECA, THE ARMADALE, THE ARRIS, THE ASPINE, THE ASTON, THE ATRIA AT MEYER, THE AZURE, THE BALMORAL, THE BALMORAL SPRING, THE BAYCOURT, THE BAYRON, THE BAYSHORE, THE BEAUMONT, THE BECCAGAYLE, THE BELLEFORTE, THE BELMONT, THE BELVEDERE, THE BENCOOLEN, THE BERTH BY THE COVE, THE BERTHSIDE, THE BLISSVILLE, THE BOTANIC ON LLOYD, THE BOULEVARD RESIDENCE, THE BOUNGAINVILLE, THE CALLISTA, THE CALROSE, THE CALYPSO, THE CAPRI, THE CARPMAELINA, THE CASSANDRA, THE CHAMPAGNE, THE CHANCERY RESIDENCE, THE CHERRYWOOD, THE CHUAN, THE CITRINE, THE CLAYMORE, THE CLAYTON, THE CLEARWATER, THE CLEMENTVALE, THE CORNWALL, THE COSMOPOLITAN, THE COUNTRYSIDE, THE COURTYARD, THE DAFFODIL, THE DAIRY FARM, THE DEW, THE DRAYCOTT, THE EASTSIDE, THE EDEN AT TAMPINES, THE EDGE ON CAIRNHILL, THE EDGEWATER, THE ELEGANCE @ CHANGI, THE ELYSIA, THE EQUATORIAL, THE ESPARIS, THE ESQUIRE, THE ESTA, THE ESTIVA, THE ESTORIL, THE FLORAVALE, THE FLORIDA, THE FOLIAGE, THE GARDENS AT BISHAN, THE GARDENS AT GERALD, THE GERANIUM, THE GLACIER, THE GLENCAIRD RESIDENCES, THE GLENWOOD, THE GRANDHILL, THE GRANDIFLORA, THE GRANGE, THE GREENWOOD, THE HABITAT II, THE HACIENDA, THE HAMLET, THE HELICONIA, THE HERMITAGE, THE HILLSIDE, THE HORIZON, THE HUNTINGTON, THE IMPERIAL, THE INFINITI, THE INGLEWOOD, THE JADE, THE LADYHILL, THE LAKESHORE, THE LEGACY, THE LEGEND, THE LEVELZ, THE LIGHT @ CAIRNHILL, THE LINC, THE LINCOLN MODERN, THE LINEAR, THE LOFT, THE MADEIRA, THE MAKENA, THE MARBELLA, THE MAYFAIR, THE MAYLEA, THE MERASAGA, THE MERGUI, THE METZ, THE MEYER PLACE, THE MIDAS, THE MONDRIAN, THE MONTANA, THE MORNING DEW, THE MORNING GLORY, THE MORNINGSIDE, THE MORNINGTON, THE NCLAVE, THE NEXUS, THE OLD HOUSE, THE ORANGE GROVE, THE OXLEY, THE PALLADIUM, THE PARK VALE, THE PATERSON, THE PATERSON EDGE, THE PEAK, THE PEARL @ MOUNT FABER, THE PETALS, THE PIER AT ROBERTSON, THE PLAZA, THE PRESTIGE COLLECTION, THE PRINCETON, THE PROMINENCE, THE QUARTZ, THE QUAYSIDE, THE QUINTET, THE RAINTREE, THE REGALIA, THE RICHMOND, THE RIVERINA, THE RIVERSIDE PIAZZA, THE RIVERVALE, THE RIVERWALK, THE SAIL @ MARINA BAY, THE SAPPHIRE, THE SEA VIEW, THE SENTINEL, THE SERENADE @ HOLLAND, THE SHAUGHNESSY, THE SHELFORD, THE SIERRA, THE SOVEREIGN, THE SPECTRUM, THE SPINNAKER, THE SPRINGBLOOM, THE SPRINGFIELD, THE SPRINGS, THE SPRINGSIDE, THE STELLAR, THE STERLING, THE SUMMIT, THE SUNFLOWER, THE SUNNIDORA, THE SUNNIFLORA, THE SUNNY SPRING, THE SUNNYDALE, THE SUNSHINE, THE TAIPAN, THE TANAMERA, THE TENERIFFE, THE TESSARINA, THE TOMLINSON, THE TREVOSE, THE TROPIC GARDENS, THE TROPICA, THE TRUMPS, THE TWINS, THE VANTAGE, THE VERMILION, THE VILLAGE, THE VILLAS @ SENTOSA COVE, THE VINES, THE WARREN, THE WATERDALE, THE WATERINA, THE WATERSIDE, THE WESTRIDGE, THE WILSHIRE, THE WINDSOR, THE WOODGROVE, THE YARDLEY

there's something about ..... being cheeky

Wah biang.... this entry by cheeky ..... damn funny. Show my wife and she can't stop laughing.

Welcome back dude!!

there's something about ..... lost and found

On the topic of food again. After my bad experience with Mr Chicken Rice, I recalled another "bad" experience with another famous food about 1-2 months ago.

This is not your famous famous kind of food but it was featured in Makan places: Lost and Found in Channel 5, hosted by Gurmit Singh and Michelle Chia. The show is about finding some of the famous foodstalls that were relocated.

This stall in question was at Lavender Food Centre.

After our hearty meal, decided that our mouth is still abit itchy, we decided to order some light food just to keep our fingers and mouth active.

We saw this POPIAH store with the sign that says "Makan Places: Lost and Found".

We thought "hor say liao.... un-intended also can eat good food", and so we ordered.

After taking a first bite... I look at my wife and ask her to try.

She took a first bite... she look back at me.

It's a scene that we often saw in Korean TV production of the romantic sort.

However, its far from romantic.

The POPIAH... TASTE LIKE.......

POPIAH!!!!!

Ninabeh. Now I know why this STALL WAS LOST in the first place. Maybe the food was so ordinary that they have to move to another location in search of some dumb-bells.

Just think about it. I open a popiah stall in Ang Mo Kio. After 3 months, my stall close down because my food taste horrible (which nobody will admit). I decided to relocate.

I find another stall in Jurong. I called it ANG MO KIO POPIAH. Consumers thought... "WAH.. must be very good hor... got name after a town one leh". Same old lousy food. Business flourish.

Singaporeans are blinded by popularity (but no substance) food.

For good Popiah... I personally like the one by CHI JI. (translation in chinese: Miracle) Though the standard can vary depending on who is preparing.

there's something about ..... zidane

Why did Zidane do it? There are many speculations. Below are some of the different versions:

"He was taunting me throughout the game saying he saw dandruffs on my shoulders"

"I was too tired and they have already make 3 substitutions, so I just have to come out"

"I have won the World Cup, Euro, Champions League, everything.... I just want to do something extraordinary to end my career. Scoring the winning goal is too boring"

"It's an unfair decision. I didn't headbutt him... his chest headbutt my head. He should be the one that got sent off!"

"I betted for 1 red card to happen in the game and I thought Italy will make it happen but didn't, so I take matters in my own head"

"I reckon the only way I can get near the World Cup trophy is to get sent off and walk past it."

there's something about ..... Mr chicken rice

Lucky me!

I have heard about former Mandarin-Hotel's Chatterbox's chicken rice chef opening his own stall at Pasir Ris Downtown East, that I kept telling myself to go there one day to eat.

I mean.... surely it can't be Mandarin Hotel's price. And even travelling down to Pasir Ris to and fro, it must still be worth the trip.

To be frank, I really can't remember how Chatterbox's chicken rice taste like. To be even more frank, I thought most chicken rice taste very similar.

To me, chicken rice is categorised as "VERY GOOD", "GOOD" and "BAD".

Fortunately most chicken rice to me belongs to "Good" and above. Thus my lack of motivation to eat at expensive Chicken Rice in Mandarin Hotel. And since it's so infrequent, I really do not remember whether Chatterbox is good or bad.

Anyway... why did I say "Lucky me".

I was lucky because I didn't have to travel all the way to Pasir Ris to try the chicken rice because they opened up a second branch in BISHAN.

And BOY... ain't I lucky. Otherwise I would imagine myself travelling all the way to Pasir Ris, eat the chicken rice.... and CURSE ALL THE WAY BACK HOME!!!!!!

The stall is called "MR CHICKEN RICE". After eating the chicken rice, I almost want to wreck his signboard.

The rice is ordinary.

The chicken is less than ordinary.

The chilli is standard chicken rice chilli.

The black sauce is the cheapest kind. Super watery.

The soup is vegetable soup.

I couldn't believe I was eating a supposedly famous chicken rice. I try to be partial and not place the hype on the brandname and judge the food accordingly.

However, based on my taste bud for chicken rice, this would have been categorised as "BAD". And the fact that this is by somebody supposedly good, I will have to rank this "VERY BAD".

Boon Tong Kee is so much better in comparison.

No wonder chatterbox has to sack him.

there's something about ..... football

It's been a busy month. It's no joke when World Cup is in town. It's no wonder that they said the market is usually quieter when the World Cup beckons, except if your market is Kopitiam Business, Pub business or if you are a Doctor. I heard the the flu bug is at the highest this June than ever before.

Anyway, I saw this advertisement by Coca Cola and I almost have a surreal experience with my brother-in-law. This is a funny advert. Note that the one on TV is a shorter version.



You see.... my relationship with my in-laws.... at best.... at most tactful.... you could call it "friendly".

We don't chat. We exchange pleasantries... if we happens to have eye-contact. On average, minus away the pleasantries, our conversation surrounded this word "Bye Bye".

However, when it comes to Football.... Football basically unite strangers. One of my brother-in-law, who is my wife's sister's husband, whom I only met during CNY.... will call me once every 2 years. The last time I received a call from him was EURO 2004. And again, he called me last night, after a 2 years absense.

I treasure such calls. I ranked them high up along calls from Telemarketeers.

You see, I'm a soccer fan. I analyse soccer games with theories. I analyse the tactics, the players the feng shui, the History. And I'm a small time puntits. I punt from Singapore Pools like $50 per game. And I strategise my betting in such a way that if I lost... I lost minimum and if I win, I win a bit more. Essentially.... I think too much.

My this brother-in-law is different. He don't analyse. Whichever team that offers a better odds, he will go for it. He went all out for a France win, against Brazil. He won handsomely. I went with Brazil win, I lost $8. The last time at EURO Final. He betted $1k for a Greece win and he won $8k. I betted for a portugal win and I lost $50.

Maybe that is why he likes to call me during football seasons. He reckons he just need to reaffirm his bets. Whatever I bet, he bet the opposite.

Anyway, back to the call. I had already placed my bets with Singapore Pools for a draw last night for Germany-Italy game, before he called. He told me that there is no way Italy will lose and he was ultra-confident Italy will win in 90 mins. He went on to tell me about his bets and how much he betted and he encouraged me to bet for Italy.

I got influenced. I mean this chap is a Big and Lucky Puntit. Surely I can't go too wrong by following him. Off I went to Singapore Pools again at about 9.45pm last night. Thinking that my "draw" slip will not earn me any money, I decided to buy alot more for an ITALY win to cover my bets for a goalless draw game.

And of course, everyone knows now that Italy did win... but only in extra-time, and full-time score was indeed a draw. I lost money.

I wish I can embrace him like the coca cola advert. when I next see him, probably next year's CNY.

But... I think I shall just stick to "Hi" and "bye"

there's something about ..... burning sensation

This is a dirty word. It's like they tell you at every injection that it felt like an ant-bite. They told me "you will feel some discomfort and some burning sensation". RIGHT... BURNING SENSATION!!!

By the way, I must have scared myself silly about my medical condition. They discovered Kidney Stones from the CT Scan last week, but decided that Cystoscopy is still necessary just to isolate the diagnosis further.

The kidney stones aren't too big and my cyst is benign in nature. What a relief. And this news came after they have done the Cystoscopy on me... So it was DOUBLE THE RELIEF! And I really meant it literally.

This scope thingy is big. The sight of it is enough for you to quit. And you always think... maybe... they will give you an Anesthetic to ease whatever "discomfort" (MY FOOT) and "Burning Sensation" (I would have given her my middle-finger, but since my anatomy is fully exposed... I felt that is not necessary).

No Anesthetic.

And you always worried on few fronts. The Pain, the result.... and WHO WILL DO IT ON ME.

And you think a nurse in uniform with my dick exposed is kinky, I can assure you any remote chance of an erection is out of the picture. She is probably the only Aunty in the Singapore who has seen the most dicks in a day. And she has a face that you wish she won't touch you for risk of having a phobia.

Before the procedure, she will keep telling you about the "little" discomfort. The thing is I don't always take things at face value. Having a scope going thru your Dick Hole is not what I would imagine a discomfort is.

And so I lie on the procedural table for a good 10 mins. In that 10 mins, it was hell. I dunno which is worse... the anticipation on what to come... or the actual thing. It doesn't help that the full sight of the cystoscope is next to me. I try to close my eyes and sing.

The first doctor came. I thought he was the Urologist but it turn out he is another intern. His job was to prepare my dick. He cleaned the whole area. After a while, he told me he is going to "inject" a gell into my dick to ease the insertion of the scope.

MY GOD!!! Imagine a solid liquid being forced into your dick hole. My whole leg cramped up. The nurse hold down my leg and told me to relax.

The feeling is a bit of pain, a lot of awkardness and a quite a fair bit of "burning sensation".

During this process, my eyes were closed. I just could not bring myself to witness this. I thought they would also "once and for all" also insert the cystoscope into me to "strike the iron when it's hot". But no........

I wonder what happened. But the next 5 mins, the doctor was cupping my dick. The nurse also left the room. Perhaps it was for the gell to settle in. Might as well, my whole body was so tense up to the cupping that I thought this 5 mins was good for me to relax.

Then the Urologist came in. Apparently, the waiting was for the actual Doctor to come in to perform the procedure on me. Suddenly, 2 other nurses came in. And I know.... Here Cums.

MY GOD TO THE INFINITY!!! This must have ranked the lowest in my life. The insertion of the scope into my dick is not only painful... but you could actually also feel the scope being wringgled into your dick and into your bladder. The awkardness of that sensation is killing.

I cramp up again. All four of them was telling me to relax. (HELLO.... HAVE YOU TRIED THIS?!??! RELAX??!?!?) One of the nurse was telling me to look into the monitor to see how the internal of my organ and bladder looks like. She said perhaps after I look into the monitor, I will know what happen and I wouldn't be so tense. (HELLO.... HAVE YOU TRIED THIS?!?!?!?)

Next come an acute pain. A Short one. After that, the Doctor said "it's in".

The pain lessen. But the awkwardness remains as the doctor was turning the scope within my dick to see the whole bladder. Each Turn of the scope, I cramp up.

The Doctor decided to do a quick one seeing my inability to relax. So he just took more pictures and soon after it was done.

I guess.... my dick was too sore that when they remove the scope, I actually didn't feel anything.

It was a relief.

They told me that I will face some "burning sensation" when I urine for the next few days.

Nabeh. Let me tell you.... urinating now is so painful that I'm trying to hold my bladder as long as I could and cut down the number of times.

Moral of the story... drink lots of water. Stay Healthy.

there's something about ..... cyst

I felt more relax now and decided to blog about my problem.

I had a Ultra-sound scan on Monday by a Urologist and they found a cyst in/on my kidney of about 5cm in size.

I was shocked. I think I have always take my life for granted and never felt so vulnerable in my life.

I have never know what cyst is. I have heard numerous times but have never bother to find out more. So when I ask the urologist what Cyst is, he felt a need to explain a term that is more commonly understood.... he said it's something like a tumour.

My world crashed.

But he explained to me that this is a common problem and may be benign in nature. As usual, I never really know what benign is. It essentially means it's not a serious problem. The opposite meaning of that could be "cancerous".

Immediately, he booked me for a CT Scan which I went on Tuesday night. The CT scan is a very clear and detail x-ray that could see the Cyst clearly, or that is what I understood.

The thing about such night visit like this is... it's quiet, the air-con is at full-blast serving very few people. You feel cold physically and emotionally. You felt very alone.

The nurse called me in and told me there is a need to inject me with Saline.

I thought Saline is what you use to wash your contact lenses. And I don't mean just a syringe of saline. It's a BAG of Saline. Apparently, it's to make my blood alot lighter in colour and thus able to see alot more clearly with the scan.

So they insert a connector of sort into my main vein of my hand. This is to be connected to the bag of Saline when I enter into the X-ray room.

And am I shocked when I enter the x-ray room.

I have done an x-ray last Friday at the A&E and I was expecting something similar. But what I saw was this.




It doesn't help when the room is very very big, very white and very bright. It makes the place very intimidating and "cold". Of course, I do not expect plants (which probably will die of radiation) or warm lights or sofa couches.

I rest on the bed, they inject me with Saline. And the bed went into the "hole" numerous times for scanning. The whole process takes about 10-15 mins real time but eternity in unreal time.

I will only know the results next wednesday when I go for another test call "cystoscopy".

Ouch.... I already felt the pain.