Monday, March 07, 2005

There's something about ..... ikea

Went Ikea yesterday morning..... alone. I was around the corner after meeting up with a client and I thought why not.

I'm always quite impressed with Ikea. They make simple-looking, sometimes cheap looking, furnitures looks good. And while they kept emphasizing that the reason why you self-carry is so that we are not charged for transportation and labour, thus keeping cost low, you can't help feeling that they are quite expensive sometimes. That to me, it's the best business model, of course losing out to one government body that earn huge profits by taking photographs!

While you think going to Ikea about 11 plus in the morning should be beat the crowds. You would be surprised to know that you actually still have to queue to drive into their carparks.

I almost turn away but thinking that I got no other plans or appointments (business is bad), I decided to stay on and boost the Retail Sector.

And when I drive into the carpark, I realised it wasn't the crowd that cause the queue as the Carpark was half-full. It's the EPS or the Electronice Payment System of the Car Park that is lunatic. They kept saying it's ERP system but I can't understand why I still have to:
  • find the window button
  • wind down my window
  • take the cash-card out of the IU
  • insert into the machine
  • Machine says "insert wrongly"
  • I try again.
  • Wait for donkey years
  • take the cash card back and put it into the IU
  • find my window button.
  • Window wind back

For an establishment so damn rich, they should just overhaul this system.

Of course, shopping in Ikea is an enriching experience. How enriching, I could write a book on it. A thin one lah.

But you always.... always.... 100% of the times..... without fail...... see a handful of couples.... gay couples. Should one day Ikea be bombed, it will kill off half the gay population in Singapore.

And mind you, Ikea is probably more than happy to be associated with them.

Today one of my client in the Luxury Goods Industry commented to me that Gay has one of the best taste in lifestyles. And since gay like Ikea, it probably means Ikea stuffs are tasteful.

Gays aside. The cafeteria there is so famous, I wonder why. They serve nice chicken wings... but which other chicken wings elsewhere are not nice.

They serve their famous sweden meatballs. They are meatballs in beef sauce. This same dish will not survive 1 year if they are sold in Parkmall.

The fries there are thicker than Macdonalds. But it's not so much their credit but more of a discredit to Macdonalds for having thin fries.

Their coffee came from coffee-maker.

Don't get me wrong. I love to dine there. But I don't necessary agee that they are THAT good. Maybe because there is a lack of options and since they serve complete meals, why not. If you realised, all other eating establishment in Ikea enjoy good business. But does that mean Burger King is the best?

Finally, I hate to pay up at Ikea. Not because I have to part with my money for something I felt it's too expensive. It's because they always ask you..."Are you a member?"

I can't stand it. I've been there numerous times and spend so much money and never have I been invited to join them as member.

And I can't help it wondering what kind of discount I'm not getting and thus over paying.

And why am I penalised for coming here numerous times spending good money each time but deem to be not so important than someone who comes once a year spending more PER receipt?

I'm just sour.

Will I go Ikea again, so that I can be frustrated at the Car park, see Gay, wait 20 mins for a table at the Cafe eating ordinary food, feel angry at the cashier because they ask an innocent question?



Anthony CYK said...

for the ikea member, take the application form at level 2, self service man!
members privelge:
1)get points to exchange things.
2)free coffee/tea every visit to ikea.

coolcat said...

Like Anthony said. Self-service! Not only a free drink, but also 1 member-discounted meal coupon. You could have checked with us :)

And nowadays, they're very keen to give renewals. Mine has been renewed automatically even though I never buy much last year.

Anonymous said...

Yesterday = In-Law's day = Siam (avoid)

Of course you wouldn't mind the queue, gay couples and crappy food in Ikea so long its an In-law's day.

moomooman said...

Damn Ikea!

Why can't they learn from all those petrol kiosk out there in Singapore!!

"Are u a member?"
"Why don't you join, it's free?"
"Why not? you enjoy reward points immediately"

You see the great difference in Service between highly competitive industry and Monopoly of Nice Furniture Highly Patronised by Gay.